150 Conversation Starters for Kids That Will Make You Closer Than Ever

Inside: The problem with most dinnertime conversation starters for kids? The questions are boring, loaded, or get you one-word answers. This is the solution.

Every night, my husband spends about an hour (or more) prepping dinner for our family of five. And I mean real cooking with veggie-chopping and meat-thawing and actual recipes, not my style of cooking that involves dumping a box of pasta into water, setting a timer, then mixing in a packet of powdered cheese.

While he cooks, my primary responsibilities include:

• Helping our oldest with her math homework
• Keeping the toddler from turning on oven burners, yanking kitchen appliance cords from the wall (while in use), and pushing chairs around so she can climb on various tables
• Reminding the preschooler that markers are for paper – and they are not for the walls, the table, or for giving “tattoos” to her little sister

Some nights, I smile as we dance around each other, like we’re all performing in a perfectly choreographed ballet. I help my oldest with a math problem and at the exact moment she gets the right answer (on her own!), the toddler runs up with a book she wants me to read. Then at the exact moment we finish reading, the preschooler asks for help putting the glue on her art project. And at the exact moment she glues the final pom pom on the paper, Ty announces dinner is ready.

Some nights.

But Here’s the Hard Truth

Most nights, it goes a little more like this…

My oldest is stuck on a math problem and gives up with “I can’t do it,” the toddler interrupts us screaming because she fell while trying to climb on a chair, and the preschooler calls out for help because she glued her hand to her hair.

I’d like to say I handle all the speed bumps of parenting with the grace and patience of Mary Poppins. But sometimes my tone gets snippy, or I ask “What were you thinking?”, or I huff and puff like the Big Bad Wolf as I clean up the mess.

Some nights when we all sit down at the dinner table, one or more of the kids are pouting, whining, or downright defiant – showing us they’re craving a positive experience (or five) to close the gap created by the most recent negative interaction.

The family dinner table gives us the perfect opportunity to reconnect with our kids, especially after we’ve devolved into rampant chaos in the hour running up to dinner.

But then Ty and I sit down across from each other, make eye contact, and immediately we know what the other one is thinking. And we know this because we’re having the same exact thought at the same time…

“Is it bedtime yet?”

Related: Why Every Parent Should Know the Magic 5:1 Ratio – And How to Do It {Printable}

Then We Fall Into This Common Parenting Trap

Unfortunately for this couple of wiped-out parents, bedtime is still two hours away.

We’re so zombified by the pre-dinnertime push that our minds draw a blank with how to get a good conversation going that will help us reconnect with our kids.

Or worse, we fall back on: “How was your day at school?”

“Fine.”

“What did you learn today?”

“Nothing.”

“Who did you play with today?”

“No one.”

But one-word answers don’t foster a good discussion, and they definitely don’t close the gap after a hectic evening.

And yet, it’s absolutely essential that we do close the gap at the dinner table because if we don’t, we pay the price later – in the form of less cooperation from the kids, more power struggles over small things, and tucking the kids into bed with a palpable feeling of disconnect hanging in the air.

Weeknights end like this more often than we’d like, and I walk away from the kids’ bedrooms with regret crushing my chest.

My husband and I collapse onto the couch, admitting to each other that we wish there were a rewind button so we could go back to the moment when we were all together at the dinner table and reconnect as a family in a meaningful way.

We realized we needed help. So I set off on a mission to solve the problem of how to get more than one-word answers out of my kids so we could have a dinnertime conversation that leaves everyone’s connection tank overflowing.

How to Unlock Your Child’s Heart: 150 Conversation Starters for Kids…That Actually Work

As busy parents, our brains are too fried to come up with questions that will get a real, meaningful conversation going. My first step: Find the best conversation starters for kids that actually work.

As it turns out, you can find lots of conversation starters for kids online, but you have to wade through quite a few doozies, like “What’s your favorite letter of the alphabet?” or “Why do you think some kids lie to their parents?” or “Caillou or Dora?” In other words: Boring, loaded, or queued up for another one-word answer that takes the conversation nowhere.

Same goes with the ready-made conversation starters you can find on Amazon. After reading tons of reviews, I found out the store-bought versions had the same problem of questions that were duds, plus the questions didn’t work well for a wide range of kiddo ages.

So I pored over every list of conversation questions for kids that I could find, and I put together the ultimate list of all the best family conversation starters. These were my criteria:

• Open-ended questions, like “How” and “Why” questions, seem to work best with getting kids to talk because they open the door to more than just one-word answers.
• The questions needed to be something adults can answer, too. Most kids don’t appreciate feeling like they’re put on the spot to perform like circus animals for the benefit of the adults around them. Plus, a conversation where everyone’s contributing is more fun anyway.
• The questions shouldn’t feel like a test or a lecture. For example, “Why do you think some kids lie to their parents?” may yield some interesting answers, but it could feel to your kid like you’re setting a trap.
• No boring questions, either. People love to talk about themselves – but not if you ask boring questions.

I waded through pages and pages of conversation starters to find the absolute best questions that kids and adults will enjoy. The final list includes 150 awesome questions, which gives you enough questions for five months of family dinners.

Get your own set of these powerful conversation starter cards here.

With these conversation starters for kids, not only will you be teaching your child the art of a good conversation, but you’ll get to peek straight into your child’s heart. What’s important to her, what has her worried, what she’s excited about.

And most important of all, you’ll close any distance that’s come between you and your child during the day so you both go to bed feeling connected, loved, and happy.

Download: 150 Family Conversation Starters That Will Unlock Your Child’s Heart

And the Answers From the Kids?

Pure. Gold.

Some nights, the answers set off a round of contagious giggles. Other nights, we wade into a deep conversation about the world that makes us stop and think about something in a different way. But every single night, I walk away from the dinner table and immediately grab my journal to capture as much of the conversation as I can remember.

Full disclosure: The toddler mostly just repeats one of the answers from her big sisters, but sometimes she surprises us by dropping her own little golden nuggets of cuteness and toddler wisdom.

But the best part comes after we all leave the dinner table:

• The kids play together without fighting at every turn. They still squabble here and there, but they work it out on their own and get back to playing faster.
• When I round up the troops for bath time, they all just head to the bath without me having to nag them 20 million times first.
• Then when it’s time to tuck them into bed, instead of feeling regret for how the evening went, I feel confident that we squeezed as much love and connection out of that night as humanly possible.

And when my husband and I collapse on the couch, we no longer wish for a rewind button. Instead, we take turns sharing our favorite quotes from the best family dinnertime conversations we’ve ever had.

Get your own set of these family conversation starters here.

Print your cards and keep these questions handy at home or in the car. Then ask a question at dinner, in the car to or from school, or any other time you want to unlock your child’s heart.

How to Use Your Conversation Starters for Kids

To save you some time, the conversation starters are designed so you can print them on pre-perforated business card templates and just pop each one out (see below). But regular ol’ paper and scissors work just fine too.

1. Download your cards here. After you order, you’ll get a special link to download your cards.
2. Print. I designed them to print on Avery business cards for inkjet^† or laser printers. Or you can just print them on regular paper or card stock, then cut the cards out or fold and tear to get a charmingly casual look.
3. Pop the cards into an empty bowl or spare mason jar, put it on your dining room table, and you’re DONE. Or to take it one step further, you can hole-punch them in one corner and put the whole set on a book ring like this. That makes the cards super portable so you can throw them in your purse or carry-on for a plane ride.

^† This site is reader-supported. When you buy through our links, we may earn an affiliate commission.

Let the kids pick a question or two to answer every night, then take turns going around the table and answering the question – and get ready to feel closer to your family than ever before. As another option, you can keep your cards in the car and ask a question on the way to or from school for an extra dose of connection!

Sneak Peek! Here’s a Sample of the Best Conversation Starters for Kids

Here’s a sample of these 150 conversation starters for kids that are guaranteed to get your child to open up. Get the full set of questions here.

Questions for Kids About Themselves

1. What are you excited about right now?
2. What was your first thought when you woke up today?
3. What do you want to accomplish by your next birthday?
4. If you could be famous for one thing, what would it be?
5. What’s the best thing about your life?
6. What’s a small thing that makes you feel happy?
7. What’s something you want to do, but you can’t yet?
8. What makes you feel loved?
9. What will you be doing in 10 years?
10. If you could only eat one food for an entire year, what would you choose?
11. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
12. What’s the best thing that has ever happened to you?

Questions for Kids About Family And Friends

1. What’s your favorite thing to do as a family?
2. What’s something nice someone said to you lately?
3. Who understands you the best?
4. If you could change one family rule, what would you change?
5. What’s your favorite thing to do with your friends?
6. If you could switch places with one person for a day, who would it be?
7. What’s something you did to help someone today?
8. What do you get to do at someone else’s house that you wish you could do at ours?
9. What advice would you give to a younger sister or brother?
10. What’s the smartest thing you heard somebody say today?

Questions for Kids About the World

1. Twenty years from now, where do you think you’ll live?
2. What’s the biggest problem in our world?
3. If you could give everybody in the world one piece of advice, what would you say?

Before You Go: 4 Quick Tips That Will Give You the Best Conversations

To keep the conversation moving, here are a few tips that have worked well for us while using these family conversation starters:

• Above all, just listen. With some questions, you may be tempted to jump in and give the “right” answer. But your kid learns better from a good conversation where you foster a healthy discussion.
• If you have a toddler or preschooler, you may have the best luck with having your youngest child go first because otherwise, they tend to just repeat what the person before them said. Which is still adorable, but it’s also fun to hear what’s bouncing around inside that growing little mind.
• If your kid says “I don’t know,” explain that there’s no right or wrong answer. You just want to hear their ideas. If they still have nothing, you can say, “We’ll give you a minute and come back to you” then move to the next person at the table.
• If your kid’s answer happens to shock you, try saying “Hmm” or “Interesting” – something noncommittal to give you time to collect yourself. If you freak out on your kid, they’ll clam up. These conversations should be fun, not stressful!

Download now: 150 Family Conversation Starters That Will Unlock Your Child’s Heart

Your Turn

What are your favorite questions to use as conversation starters for kids? Share in a comment below!