The Best Questions to Ask Your Kid Instead of “How Was Your Day?”

Inside: Stop asking your kid “How was your day?” because it doesn’t work anyway. Here are the best questions for kids that will actually foster a fun conversation.

Every evening at the dinner table, my husband and I used to fall into this age-old parenting trap:

“How was your day?”
“Fine.”

“What did you learn today?”
“Nothing.”

“Who did you play with at recess?”
“No one.”

But one-word answers don’t foster a good discussion, and they certainly don’t help us reconnect with our kids after a long day apart from each other.

And yet, it’s absolutely essential that we do reconnect because if we don’t, we pay the price later.

When we’re all feeling connected, the kids jump in to help clean up after dinner—without being asked. They pay attention the first time we ask them to brush their teeth and get jammies on. When we tuck them into bed, they’re all giggles and smiles.

But when we’re all feeling disconnected? We get less cooperation, more power struggles, and grumbles and grimaces at bedtime instead.

Ready for a solution now? Get these fun printable family conversation starters and use them at the end of every day to reconnect with your child.

What If We Asked Our Kids Better Questions?

I realized I needed to solve the problem of one-word responses so we could have a meaningful family conversation. Because conversations like that leave everyone’s connection tank overflowing, plus they contribute to a healthy parent-child bond. In fact, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that you consistently engage in that kind of active listening with your child.

But as busy parents, we’re too exhausted to be creative and come up with questions to ask kids that will get a real, meaningful conversation going. So my first step was to find the best questions for kids that actually work at getting your kids to open up.

You can find lots of questions for children online, but you have to wade through quite a few duds, like:

• “What’s your favorite number?” or
• “Why do you think some kids disobey their parents?” or
• “Frozen or The Incredibles?”

In other words: Boring, loaded, or queued up for another one-word answer that takes the conversation nowhere.

Same goes with the ready-made conversation starters you can find on Amazon. After reading tons of reviews, I found out the store-bought versions of “questions of the day for kids” had the same problem—questions that were duds, plus the questions didn’t work well for a wide range of child ages.

Related: 7 Best Family Bonding Games That Will Help You Reconnect Quickly {Printable}

Here’s How These Questions for Kids Are Different

I devoured every list of questions for kids I could find, and I compiled the ultimate list of all the best questions for kids. These were my criteria:

• Open-ended questions for kids work best, like “How” and “Why” questions. These types of questions get kids talking because they open the door to more than just one-word answers. On the other hand, a question like “What’s your favorite color?” or “What’s your favorite outfit?” doesn’t foster a meaningful conversation.
• Any questions to ask your kids should be something adults can answer, too. Most kids don’t appreciate feeling like they’re put on the spot to perform like circus animals for the benefit of the surrounding adults. Plus, a conversation where everyone’s contributing is more fun anyway.
• No boring questions. Research shows people love talking about themselves—but not if you ask boring questions.
• No trivia questions. You’re trying to foster a meaningful conversation, not quiz your child on who’s the current President of the United States or what’s the fastest land animal. (A cheetah!)
• And this one’s important: Any questions to ask your child shouldn’t feel like a test or a lecture. For example, “Why do you think some kids disobey their parents?” may give you some interesting answers, but your kid could feel like you’re setting a trap.

100 Questions for Kids…That They’ll Actually Answer

With these questions for kids, not only will you be teaching your child the art of conversation, but you’ll get to peek straight into their heart. You’ll go beyond the surface-level questions about their favorite movie, toy, or pizza topping—and tap into what’s important to them, what has them worried, and what they’re excited about.

And most important of all, you’ll close any distance that’s come between you and your child during the day so you both end the day feeling connected, loved, and happy.

To get a printable version of the full set of 150 questions for kids, get my family conversation starter cards here. Included in this post below, you’ll find 100 of the best questions for kids from those conversation starters.

These questions work for a wide range of ages, from toddler to teen and everything in between. You’ll find a mix of silly questions and thought-provoking questions, plus quite a few meaningful conversation starters that will bring out answers that are sure to warm your heart.

Open-Ended Questions for Kids

When you want to get your child talking, open-ended questions like these work best:

1. What are you excited about right now?
2. What was your first thought when you woke up today?
3. What do you want to accomplish by your next birthday?
4. What do you love about yourself?
5. What’s something that’s hard for you?
6. What was the last time you felt mad?
7. What’s the best thing about your life?
8. What’s a small thing that makes you feel happy?
9. What’s something you want to do, but you can’t yet?
10. What makes you feel loved?
11. What do you know how to do that you could teach others to do?
12. What’s the best thing that has ever happened to you?
13. What’s the worst thing that has ever happened to you?
14. What are you most proud of?
15. When you’re feeling sad, what makes you feel better?
16. Which rule do you have to follow that doesn’t make sense?
17. If you could pack anything in your lunch tomorrow, what would it be?
18. What makes you feel special?
19. What is the best part of every day?
20. What is the worst part of every day?
21. What’s the best gift you ever received?
22. What do you worry about the most?
23. What’s something you’re looking forward to?
24. What’s something you’d like to get rid of or throw away?
25. What’s something you work hard at?
26. When do you feel happiest?
27. What’s your favorite holiday—the one you look forward to the most?
28. What’s your favorite thing to do outside?
29. What’s your favorite thing to do as a family?
30. What’s the best part of our family?
31. What’s something nice someone said to you lately?
32. Who understands you the best?
33. What’s your favorite thing to do with your friends?
34. What’s something you did to help someone today?
35. Who made you smile today?
36. What’s your favorite family tradition? Why?
37. What was the last time someone was mad at you?

Funny Questions to Ask Kids

Your child’s answers to these silly or funny questions for kids will get you and your child giggling:

1. What’s the funniest thing somebody did or said today?
2. If you could only eat one food for an entire year, what would you choose?
3. What’s your favorite joke?
4. If you were a superhero with one superpower, what would it be?
5. If you could change your name to anything, what would you change it to? (Or would you leave it?)
6. If you could stay up all night, what would you do?
7. If somebody from another planet came to Earth, what would they think of our world?
8. If you had three wishes, what would they be?
9. Would you rather live in a castle, on a boat, or on a cloud?
10. If you buried a treasure chest, what would you put in it?
11. What is the most annoying noise in the world?
12. If people could see inside you, what would they see?
13. If you could be anything for Halloween, what would you be?
14. If you had an extra room in your house, what would you use it for?
15. If you could create one law that everybody on Earth had to follow, what would it be?
16. If you were invisible, where would you go and what would you do?

Related: 120 Funny Questions to Ask Kids for Guaranteed Giggles

Thought-Provoking Questions for Kids

These thought-provoking questions go beyond the bland status quo of “How was school today?” Instead of hearing a one-word answer in response, you’ll get a peek into how your child’s mind works.

1. If you could be famous for one thing, what would it be?
2. If you could be any animal, what would you be? Why?
3. What will you be doing in 10 years?
4. What’s the most important choice you will have to make in your life?
5. What’s your earliest memory?
6. Do you like morning or night better? Why?
7. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change?
8. If you had to choose only three words to describe yourself, what would you say?
9. If you won $1000, what would you do with it?
10. If you could be any book character, who would you be?
11. What is something you would never change about yourself?
12. What would you like to invent?
13. Which one of your 5 senses (sight, hearing, smell, taste, or touch) is most important? Why?
14. If you could be any age, which age would you choose? Why?
15. If you could be the best in the world at something, what would it be?
16. What’s something you used to dislike, but you now like?
17. Which three words would you use to describe our family?
18. If you could start a company that made something, what would that be?
19. Which do you prefer: a messy room or a clean room? Why?
20. What’s the most important thing you’ve learned so far?
21. What’s the hardest thing about being you?
22. What is one thing you want to learn how to do?
23. If you were stuck on a desert island but could pick three things to bring, what would they be?
24. What does it mean to show respect to someone?
25. If you could change one family rule, what would you change?
26. If you could switch places with one person for a day, who would it be?
27. What do you get to do at someone else’s house that you wish you could do at ours?
28. What advice would you give to a younger sister or brother?
29. Who do you admire? Why?
30. What do your friends like best about you?
31. If one of your parents described you, what would he or she say?
32. If you could start a new family tradition, what would it be?
33. What’s the most important job in the world?
34. What’s the most fun job in the world?
35. What is the best part of being a grown-up?
36. What is the best part of being a kid?
37. What’s the smartest thing you heard somebody say today?
38. If we didn’t have to go to school or work on Monday, what would you want to do all day?
39. Has someone ever asked you to do something you didn’t want to do?
40. What’s the most important thing for a parent to do?
41. Twenty years from now, where do you think you’ll live?
42. What’s something grown-ups get to do that you wish you could do?
43. What does it mean for two people to be in love?
44. If you could give everybody in the world one piece of advice, what would you say?
45. If you could learn any language, what would you learn?
46. What will the world be like in 10 years? What will be the same? What will be different?
47. If you could live in another country for one year, where would you live?

Before You Go: 4 Quick Tips for the Best Conversations

Your Turn

What are your favorite questions of the day for kids? Let’s help our fellow parents discover another way to say “How was your day?” that will actually get a conversation going. Share your best questions to ask children in a comment below!